growing up a tiny bit

I remembered recently that growth comes through making mistakes and confronting challenges. And although it is painful to look back at myself during embarrassing, shameful moments, it is really beautiful to know that I am not trapped by those memories. They are in the past, and I am here, in the position to learn from my mistakes. Sometimes it's easy to be intimidated by "challenging" things, and give it a negative label. But they're probably good for us.
The most interesting information about people is not what happens to them, but how they respond to what happens to them. Often, we cannot control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. I can feel sorry for myself, miserable, and ashamed or I can be grateful for what God has given me--which is so much.
It's been good to have a friend remind me of the dangers of guilt in my life. Guilt and conviction are two very different things and God calls us to the latter. Guilt is shrouded in the things of the past, which are fixed. No one is ever guilty for what he will do. But conviction reaches to the things of the future, which are open. In that way, conviction guides us to live well, but guilt distracts us from living well.
There are more challenges ahead, more "storms" on the horizon, and when I am confronted by them, I want to run straight into them. Because if I run away (as I have in the past) the storms will follow me, and the storm ends up lasting longer that way, since we're both going in the same direction.